


Regrets

by watarimiyako



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, Gen, Multi, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, They/Them Pronouns for Hange Zoë, ex to lovers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-15
Packaged: 2021-03-23 15:21:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30057492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watarimiyako/pseuds/watarimiyako
Summary: Levi started to live his new life in the city as a college student. He was hoping for nothing, but a peaceful college life. Nonetheless, the trauma that he thought he had already forgotten was coming up to the surface, again. The person who left him three years ago, Hange Zoe, appeared to be his classmate.
Relationships: Erwin Smith & Hange Zoë, Erwin Smith/Hange Zoë, Levi Ackerman & Zeke Yeager, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë, Mikasa Ackerman/Jean Kirstein
Kudos: 14





	Regrets

**Author's Note:**

> So, I finally wrapped this fic after procrastinating for weeks. Hopefully, I can update the next chapter in short time. The story will be focused on Levi and Hange relationship, I will try my best to highlight the side pairings too! Enjoy.

The blue sky gushing tons of sunlight blanketed the festive city and the magnificent building that stood like a fierce lion. Outside the tall and vast building, Paradis University, stood a short man with his undercut raven hair. Carrying a black backpack on his right shoulder, he heaved a deep sigh as he moved his feet to enter the building. Levi scrutinized the new environment. The sight was utterly distinct from the place he used to live. The people were mobilizing without taking a glance. Their eyes were covered with thick glasses and transfixed on the screen that was gripped on their soft palms – _it reminded him of them, the person who left him three years ago._

"They surrender to a robot, huh? What a pity," said Levi while clicking his tongue, showing his grimace to the so-called-modern-people who succumbed to technology.

Never once in his life, Levi ever thought he would decide to move to the city. Pursuing his dream by entering a university was the far dream of his. Upon living his peaceful life in the countryside, he always showed the gratitude he had received because he didn't have to deal with the smug people around him. It's already a handful to deal with the complexity within his mind. He wouldn't even bother to care about something that didn't affect any bits of his life; his destiny, however, proved otherwise. Levi had no choice but to accept the reality he just took. Although it seemed as though as a giant rock, Levi was not the type of person who was easily surrendered to the desperate circumstances. He knew he was able to overcome the fears - or even burn every single one of those into ashes.

After taking a few steps into the building, Levi finally brought himself to the Global Health Governance class, one of the courses he took in his major, Political Science. Concealing his midget hands inside the pockets of his black jeans, Levi scoffed his breath as he clicked his tongue. As he stepped the charcoal shoes of his inside the class, his heart beating fast and his cold sweat rolling down to his forehead. Seeing so many people inside the room triggered his old trauma. Nonetheless, he clenched his teeth and fisted his palms to cease away the trauma pictured on his head. Levi took a deep breath to calm him down, wiping his sweat with his white cravat.

"Humans," He muttered while taking his seat at the back of the room, to ensure no one dared to bother him.

The loud chatters filled up space inside the classroom. Levi found it annoying because he realized that he would get his peaceful life only for the weekends, assuming he would get one. He clicked his tongue again, the rattled sounds kept bothering him when he was to lay his head on the table. Before he was able to close the heavy lids of his eyes, someone fell on their knees and echoed a loud thud throughout the narrow classroom, causing a sudden awkward silence between the people inside.

"Eh, I am sorry!" The brunette person with oval glasses and disheveled hair exclaimed as they tried to get their knees up from the cold marble floor. Levi, who was near to the dreamland, was forced to open his heavy lids because of the chaotic scene. His hair messed up a bit, Levi gained his consciousness and scrunched his thin eyebrows to glare at the person who bothered his peaceful sleep. He couldn't precisely see the figure of the person because they were currently stacking up the scattered books on the floor; however, he could vividly hear their high-pitched voice saying countless apologies.

After taking a while, the brunette-haired person finally finished cleaning up their mess and bowed in front of the class as a form of an apology. They put a show on their face as they stretched their cheeks until the point they closed their eyes, ensuring no one saw their weird antique. When the person started shifting to take their seat, Levi's eyes circled in surprise, his heart dropped from its usual place.

"Hange," He whispered as his throat ached, resisting the tears to stain his cheekbones that appeared to be thinner than it was three years ago.

His mouth stiffened as the person diverted their gaze to Levi. Hange put their attention to the man sitting at the back when they heard his low whisper. With no hesitation, Hange etched their face with a smile and responded to the man's husky voice. "Yes, may I help you?" they grinned while putting their loaded books on the table across him. Minutes passed, however, Levi didn't show any response to their genuine offer. Tons of memories flashed before his eyes; Levi’s sudden headache caused him to shiver his lips as it felt so gnawing within his body. A barrage of emotions hit his broad chest as he vividly remembered the person standing in front of him. It was them, Hange Zoe, the person who left him three years ago without uttering any single reasons nor explanations. They were the root of his trauma, the trauma of being abandoned and surrounded by people.

Hange tilted their head while fixing the glasses on their crooked nose. They frowned as they noticed something weird with the undercut-haired man. Hange leaned their face to look at Levi, they faced him to seek what actually happened. Their heads were now facing each other, only spared a little distance between them. The obsidian of their eyes met Levi’s grim gaze, his eyes exuded indecipherable emotions. Those eyes were filled with sadness and rage, it seemed like he buried those deep down within the cage of his heart. Aside from that, they could smell the masculine cologne emitting from the collar of his shirt. It was the same scent as the man they left three years ago, a clean musk with the scent of morning dew. Hange shivered down to their spine, feeling the wrapped emotions enveloped their figure.

_It was… him._

The moment they realized that they knew the man, Hange stomped backward to distance themself from Levi. The professor came into the class and signaled that he was to start the class.

“Okay, students. Let me start the class with a question, what do you know about Global Health Governance?” Asked the professor to the students, observing the classroom as the sound of flipping books echoing through the room.

Hange took their seat in an awkward demeanor as they tried to steal a glance at Levi. Sliding their glasses off their ears, Hange wiped it with the hem of their dirty shirt, leaving more stain on their specs. Their body engulfed the prolonged pain from the event three years ago, Hange bit the supple skin of their lips while thrusting their nails to the rough palms. Their breath getting heavier and their cold sweat rolling down to their forehead, Hange stood up from their chair, carelessly leaving the classroom without bringing their bag.

Every pair of eyes inside the room gazed into Hange’s sudden action; the professor squeezed his white eyebrows as he moved his eyes to see Hange coming out from his class. Levi, who was still processing what just happened, took a firm grip of his hair. His charcoal eyes tried to hold back his anger as he heaved a rough breath to calm himself. That person, Hange, appeared right in front of his eyes after three years. The moment where he left alone by himself in the middle of the crowd flashing on his convoluted mind. _Hange is here._

Neglecting his purpose to continue the class, Levi took all of his stuff into his bag, causing the people to eyed in his direction. Honestly, he did not care anymore, the only thing he wanted at the moment was to see their face once again and asked the reasons why they left him alone without uttering any words. He just wanted to know why Hange turned their cold shoulder without even looking back at him.

 _Did I do something wrong? Have I hurt them? Why did they leave me alone knowing that I was suffering? Was I a burden to them?_

The questions lingered on his head while he sprinted around the university building to find Hange. Levi coughed as he ran out of breath, leaning down to his knee to fill his lungs with some air. With the drip of his sweat soaking his clothes, Levi pulled out his cravat hooked on his collar, and wiped the sweats on his forehead. His body sitting down on the floor, his shoulder resting to the wall, Levi closed his lids and covered his face with the white cravat.

 _Life sucks, indeed._ He whispered to himself.

Taking another deep sigh, Levi got up from his seat and tapped his clothes to get rid of the dust clinging to his body. He was thinking of going back to the class, but he knew it was kind of absurd. It was such a reckless act of him, leaving the class without asking for permission, just to chase someone who gave zero screws to him. Levi clicked his tongue and strolled onto the downstairs, leaving the building to go to the cafe.

* * *

“Darn it! Today’s extremely hot, I should’ve worn more comfortable clothes,” Hange exclaimed as they took a seat on the garden bench in front of the campus building. They pulled their head back, looking onto the calming tree above them. Hange smiled, followed by a little laugh as they closed their eyes. The world was a small cubicle to live in, yet the sky made it seem like a limitless place to explore. Hange would never imagine they would meet Levi again. They were running away along with all the guilts for the past three years, yet they had to face him once again.

Hange let out a chuckle as a mockery, why did they think they could run away easily after what they had done to him? Hands clasped on their laps, Hange opened their eyes then stood up from their seat. Tightening their fists, they decided to confront their guilts and explained every single detail to Levi. Surely, it was a bad idea to suddenly show up in front of him after they blatantly left the classroom because of him. However, there was no better idea considering they would be in the same class with him for one semester in their sophomore year, and Hange wouldn’t risk their grades just because of a trivial matter.

“Why did I sign up for this class, anyway? I should’ve stayed on my lane,” Hange messed their hair and sighed. They knew it was impossible because the scholarship obliged them to take the course outside their major so they could work as a biology researcher in a government institute after graduating from college. Tugging their bottom lip into their mouth, Hange rushed back to the classroom to find him and take the belongings they left.

* * *

Levi stepped outside the campus building while piercing his gaze, the sunlight was scorching until it penetrated his skin. Sweats running onto his forehead, Levi took the folded umbrella from his bag to protect him from the gushing sunlight. His small hands putting up the wide umbrella, Levi held it above his head and set his eyes forward. A figure of a person appeared in front of him, exhilarating a deep breath as they looked exhausted.

“Levi,” The word they uttered from their mouth was a drug to Levi, it made him lose his mind. Levi stilled as he took a firm grip around the handle of his umbrella, the pad of his hands sweating and running cold. However, Hange was acting indifferent to Levi’s stoic expression. They let out a small laugh to live up the awkwardness between them and to start a conversation with him. “You don’t change a bit,” Hange tugged a smile on their face as they walked closer to Levi. Tightening the grip of his umbrella, Levi stepped backward, his eyes avoiding Hange’s gaze. Hange circled their eyes upon seeing Levi’s response to their action, causing Hange to create a distance between them. They had no choice but to put on another grin to calm themself.

Hange fixed their glasses before they finally opened their mouth to speak. Clearing their throat, Hange faced Levi with their non-existent confidence.

“It was all my fault,” said Hange with their face facing the ground, they didn’t have enough courage to look at him. Levi was indifferent, his stare was a blank canvas and Hange couldn’t interpret the colors.

“My family had financial problems, back then, right after we agreed to date each other.” Hange exhaled his breath and sucked the saliva into their aching throat, resisting the tears coming down to their cheeks. The throbbing pain pierced their chest when Levi started talking.

“Hange,” He called with his low voice, fixing his gaze on theirs. Hange was frozen ice. Their mouth stiffened right after Levi called their name.

“I never beg you to explain what happened to you, nor us,” Levi explained. His throat hurting so much, Levi had to put on an act so it would seem like he could care less about their presence in his life. Nonetheless, it was not an easy task for him.

The howling wind danced around the both of them, followed by a thud on the ground. Hange dropped on their knees, their eyes staring blankly. Levi was aghast by the sudden reaction from them. His eyes tailing their figure, he resisted not to help them.

_Hange, don’t do this to me._

“You’re right, Levi,” Hange opened their mouth while chuckling a bit.

“I don’t have the right to explain this to you after what I have done.” They scoffed and messed their disheveled hair. Their palms facing the ground, Hange resisted the tears to roll down onto their cheeks.

A heavy silence blanketed the atmosphere. The silence was deafening that they could hear the wind growling into their ears. Levi was voiceless as if he couldn’t utter any single words from his mouth. Seeing the person he loved so hurt made him question himself.

“Don’t worry, Hange,” He spoke in a calm demeanor. Tilting their head, Hange fixed their gaze on Levi.

“Just act as nothing happened between us,” He paused to take a breath before he finally uttered his last words.

“You live your own life, and so do I. We never know each other, and that’s it.” Levi continued as he heaved a deep sigh as he left Hange behind, without bidding any goodbyes.

_Just like when Hange left him three years ago._

Hange stilled on the ground. They couldn’t even move their body after hearing his statement. They never realized how much it hurt for him when they left three years ago. Without words, without explanations. Hange laughed at themself, realizing how foolish their action was.

Hange never had any regrets, but now they had one, and it was something they could never fix.

_Levi, I am sorry. I wish you could understand._


End file.
